Dignity Sept 1st 2013

"This above all — to thine own self be true"

"For the apparel oft proclaims the man"

-Polonius

Hamlet, Act One, scene iii

William Shakespeare

These two ideas have been stirring in my mind for the last few weeks, and thanks to Miley Cyrus they've finally coalesced into something hopefully coherent. I actually disagree with Shakespeare and Polonius about the apparel proclaiming the man. We all have dignity within us that cannot be hidden by old, worn clothing or taken by poverty or unfortunate circumstance. I spent a brief time decades ago in a homeless shelter. It was simply a case of misfortune. The only job I could find where I lived was a temporary job, and it ran out. I couldn't find another. So I needed a place to go for shelter and help while I got back on my feet. I did so, and then went back to the shelter to volunteer for the same amount of time that I had spent living there. It seemed the only decent thing to do. But the point is, while I was there, I got up early every day. I showered, I didn't drink, I didn't panhandle and I didn't blame the world for my problems. I accepted my circumstances and did the best I could to rise above them. Here's the point though. At no point during that experience did I use it as an excuse to let go of my dignity. I never gave up on success or prosperity BY MY OWN HAND. It was never a matter of, 'this is what life has done to me so now you have an obligation give me something'. It was always a matter of 'what can I do to survive and get out of here'. And I did. I kept myself clean, I found a job, I saved money and I got out. 

These days, however, you can't seem to walk down the street without seeing groups of people sitting at bus stops or around the corner from convenience stores drinking and laughing and bemoaning what the rich have done to them. Then they stop long enough to panhandle from you. You may have lost your job because of the economy. You may have been outsourced or laid off to protect a profit margin. That is all possible and if so it isn't your fault. But nobody is forcing you to sit out in public drinking and panhandling. You made that decision. You are responsible for that. You have given away your dignity in favor of a cheap beer or whatever else. That is your choice, but it also says something about your character. I sympathize and actually empathize with your circumstances, but we both know that you can deal with it better than that. I've actually talked to a few of our local homeless people, and some of them have talked about plans to get to where there are more jobs. To clean up and take control of their lives. That's fine, except that two months later, the same people are there, looking more worn and torn and tattered, drinking a little more and singing the same song about what they are going to do. There are people who will help, but you have to go to them and ask. That willingness to walk away from the corner, from the other homeless people, the drinking friends who live at the same bus stop or parking lot is called dignity. 

And Miley Cyrus. Miley Cyrus has given us a prime example of the fact that (just as poverty cannot rob you of it) riches and fans and noteriety cannot give you dignity. Just as a homeless person can show great dignity, a mega star who has millions of dollars can shed it quicker than she sheds her clothes. I find it curious that one tries to demonstrate her 'adulthood' by acting in a way that is anything but mature. Sort of the same logic as calling a strip club a 'gentleman's club'. It is in truth just the opposite.